You won’t believe what happened when Chairman Mao tried to create a sexless society! From bizarre bedroom bans to mandatory morning exercises, this guy really took the concept of abstinence to a whole new level. Get ready to have your mind blown by these kinky, funny, and downright shocking details about the most sex-averse leader in modern history.

1. Chairman Mao’s Crusade Against Carnal Desires

Chairman Mao had a serious bone to pick with sex. He believed that physical intimacy was a distraction from the revolutionary cause, and he was determined to stamp it out of Chinese society. His solution? Implement a nationwide program of “sexual hygiene” that would transform the country into a bastion of chastity.

Mandatory Celibacy for the Communist Elite

At the heart of Mao’s sexless society plan was a ban on sex for high-ranking Communist Party members. These party cadres were expected to remain celibate, with severe consequences for those who dared to indulge in carnal pleasures. Can you imagine being a top government official and having to explain to Mao why you were caught with your pants down?

The “Friendship Marriage” Loophole

Of course, people being people, some crafty comrades found a way around the bedroom ban. They started entering into “friendship marriages” - platonic partnerships that allowed them to maintain the facade of sexual abstinence while still enjoying the occasional tryst on the side. Mao was not amused.

2. Morning Calisthenics: Mao’s Answer to Wet Dreams

Concerned that his celibacy campaign wasn’t enough to curb the physical urges of the masses, Chairman Mao came up with an ingenious solution: mandatory morning exercises. These dawn fitness sessions were designed to literally shake the sexual desire out of the population.

The Flailing Four: Mao’s Favorite Moves

Mao’s favorite exercise moves included:

• The “Arm Flail” - Rapidly swinging the arms in wide circles to dispel any lingering arousal.
• The “Leg Lift” - Raising the legs high in the air to get the blood flowing away from, ahem, sensitive areas.
• The “Hip Shake” - Gyrating the hips in an effort to jiggle away unholy thoughts.
• The “Squat and Thrust” - Vigorous up-and-down movements to dislodge any unwanted physical responses.

The Rewards of Rigorous Routine

Mao firmly believed that these morning calisthenics would not only keep the population’s libidos in check, but also forge a new breed of disciplined, physically fit revolutionaries. What could be sexier than that?

3. The Great Leap Backward: Mao’s Plan to Desexualize China

Chairman Mao’s grand vision for a sexless society went far beyond just banning sex and enforcing morning exercises. He wanted to fundamentally transform the very fabric of Chinese culture to eliminate any trace of sensuality or eroticism.

Destroying the “Four Olds”

Mao’s “Four Olds” campaign targeted the traditional elements of Chinese civilization that he deemed too decadent and sexually charged. This included:

• Old Customs - Practices like arranged marriages and courtship rituals were banned as relics of a feudal past.
• Old Culture - Erotic art, literature, and poetry were purged from the public sphere.
• Old Habits - Things like wearing makeup, styling hair, and discussing sex were frowned upon as bourgeois indulgences.
• Old Ideas - Philosophical and religious concepts associated with sensuality, like Taoism and Confucianism, were suppressed.

The Rise of Androgynous “Model Citizens”

In place of these “corrupt” influences, Mao promoted a new aesthetic of androgynous, asexual “model citizens.” Men and women were expected to dress in identical, shapeless “Mao suits” and adopt a unisex appearance. Anything that hinted at gender or sexuality was seen as a dangerous remnant of the old order.

4. When Cupid Met the Red Guard: Love in the Time of Maoism

You’d think that with all of Mao’s efforts to stamp out sex, the Chinese people would have just thrown in the towel and accepted a lifetime of celibacy. But it turns out the human desire for intimacy is pretty hard to extinguish, even in the face of authoritarian rule.

Romantic Resistance: The Forbidden Thrill of Clandestine Courtship

Young Chinese rebels found creative ways to defy Mao’s sexual strictures. Couples would sneak away to hidden alcoves for furtive trysts, passing notes and exchanging furtive glances to communicate their forbidden feelings. The risk of getting caught only added to the excitement.

The “Butterfly Lovers” of the Cultural Revolution

One of the most famous examples of romantic resistance during the Mao era was the story of the “Butterfly Lovers.” This tragic tale of two star-crossed students who committed suicide rather than be torn apart by the regime became a symbol of youthful defiance against the puritanical dictates of the Cultural Revolution.

5. Mao’s Weird Obsession with Women’s Breasts

You’d think that a man so committed to stamping out sexuality would want to avoid anything remotely erotic. But it turns out Chairman Mao had a rather peculiar fixation on one particularly titillating body part: women’s breasts.

The Great Breast Debate

Mao was deeply troubled by the sight of women’s breasts, which he viewed as a dangerous distraction from the revolutionary cause. This led to heated debates within the Communist Party about the proper way to address this “problem.” Some officials advocated binding women’s breasts to flatten their appearance, while others proposed outright banning the display of cleavage.

Mao’s Bizarre Breast Inspections

In the end, Mao decided that the best way to deal with the breast issue was through good old-fashioned surveillance. He ordered his cadres to conduct regular “breast checks” on women, ostensibly to ensure they were properly covered up. Can you imagine the awkwardness of having Mao himself scrutinize your chest for any signs of indecency?

6. The Great Famine: When a Sexless Society Meets Starvation

As if Mao’s crusade against sex wasn’t enough, the disastrous policies of the Great Leap Forward also contributed to widespread famine and starvation across China. This created a perfect storm of abstinence and deprivation that had some rather unexpected consequences.

Starving for Intimacy: The Rise of Cannibalism

With food supplies dwindling, some desperate Chinese resorted to the unthinkable: consuming human flesh. In the ultimate act of sexual deprivation, there were even reports of people eating the genitals of the dead in a twisted attempt to absorb their life force.

Starving Sexless Couples: Marital Strife and Divorce

The combination of hunger, hardship, and enforced celibacy also took a toll on Chinese marriages. Couples who were already struggling to keep the spark alive found themselves at each other’s throats, with divorce rates spiking dramatically during the Great Famine.

7. Mao’s Secret Sex Life: The Chairman’s Sordid Bedroom Habits

For all his public moralizing about the evils of sex, it turns out Chairman Mao was quite the enthusiastic practitioner of carnal delights in private. Despite his mission to create a sexless society, the Chairman had a voracious appetite for physical intimacy that he indulged in with reckless abandon.

The Harem of Mao

Mao surrounded himself with a veritable harem of young women, many of whom were forced to become his personal concubines. He would summon these women to his bedroom for marathon sex sessions, sometimes keeping them captive for days on end.

Mao’s Kinky Proclivities

The Chairman’s sexual tastes were said to be quite unusual, even by the standards of the time. Witnesses reported that he had a particular fondness for role-playing, bondage, and other kinky activities that were strictly forbidden for the general populace.

8. The Tragedy of the “Third-Wife Policy”

Perhaps the most disturbing aspect of Mao’s sexual hypocrisy was his implementation of a twisted policy that allowed party officials to take multiple wives. This “Third-Wife Policy” was presented as a way to promote larger families and boost the population, but in reality, it was a thinly veiled cover for widespread sexual exploitation.

Forced Concubinage and Coerced Abortions

Under this system, high-ranking cadres were essentially granted the right to keep harems of women, many of whom were coerced into becoming their “third wives” through a combination of political pressure and outright threats. These women were often forced to undergo abortions if they became pregnant by anyone other than their “husband.”

The Traumatic Aftermath of the Third-Wife Policy

The legacy of the Third-Wife Policy is one of immense suffering and trauma. Many of the women who were victimized by this system were left emotionally scarred, with some even committing suicide to escape their nightmarish circumstances. It’s a sobering reminder of the dark underbelly of Mao’s sexless society vision.

9. The Strange Legacy of Mao’s Asexual Aesthetic

Even after Mao’s death, the influence of his crusade against sex and sensuality continued to linger in Chinese culture. The androgynous, desexualized “model citizen” look that he championed remained a prevalent aesthetic long after the end of the Communist revolution.

The Continuing Allure of Mao Suits and Crew Cuts

The ubiquitous Mao suit, with its shapeless silhouette and utilitarian design, became a enduring symbol of Chinese fashion. And the short, closely cropped “military” hairstyle that was mandatory during the Mao era continued to be a popular look for both men and women.

The Lingering Influence of Mao’s Asexual Ideals

Even in the modern era, where China has embraced a more capitalist economy, the legacy of Mao’s sexless society vision can still be seen in the country’s cultural and social norms. There’s often a strong aversion to open displays of sexuality, and many Chinese people still adhere to a more reserved, desexualized public persona.

10. Mao’s Mixed Legacy: A Cautionary Tale of Sexual Repression

At the end of the day, Chairman Mao’s crusade to create a sexless society in China stands as a cautionary tale about the dangers of extreme sexual repression. While his intentions may have been rooted in a misguided belief that abstinence would lead to a more disciplined, revolutionary populace, the reality was a tragic tale of human suffering, warped desires, and the futile attempt to stamp out one of our most fundamental drives.

The Resilience of the Human Libido

Despite Mao’s best efforts, the human libido proved to be remarkably resilient. People found creative ways to express their sexuality, even in the face of harsh crackdowns and severe punishments. This speaks to the enduring power of our basic carnal urges, which no amount of authoritarian control can fully extinguish.

The Lasting Scars of Sexual Suppression

Yet the legacy of Mao’s sexless society vision has left deep scars on Chinese culture and society. The lingering aversion to open displays of sexuality, the prevalence of a desexualized aesthetic, and the trauma experienced by those victimized under Mao’s regime - all of these elements continue to reverberate through modern China. It’s a sobering reminder that attempting to forcibly repress human nature often leads to unintended and disastrous consequences.