Sat Jul 06 - Written by: Nikki Martinez
How Is A Sexless Marriage Defined
Struggling with intimacy in your marriage? Discover the secrets behind a sexless union - from hidden causes to unexpected solutions. Unlock the path to revitalizing your connection.
So you and your partner just aren’t getting it on like you used to, huh? Don’t worry, you’re not alone. In fact, according to a recent study, nearly 1 in 6 married couples are considered to be in a “sexless marriage”. But what exactly does that term mean, and how do you know if you and your significant other have reached that point? Buckle up, because we’re about to dive deep into the how is a sexless marriage defined and uncover the telltale signs that your relationship may be lacking in the bedroom department.
What Exactly is a Sexless Marriage?
The definition of a “sexless marriage” can be a bit murky, as it’s not an official clinical term. However, most experts agree that a marriage is considered sexless if the couple has sex less than 10 times per year. That may sound like a ridiculously low number, but when you factor in things like busy schedules, stress, and the natural ebb and flow of physical intimacy, it’s actually not all that uncommon.
The Myth of the “Ideal” Frequency
It’s important to note that there’s no one-size-fits-all when it comes to a healthy sex life. Some couples are perfectly content with getting it on once a month, while others need it multiple times a week to feel satisfied. The key is finding a frequency that works for both partners. If you and your spouse are on different pages when it comes to how is a sexless marriage defined, it can certainly lead to tension and resentment.
The Causes of a Sexless Marriage
Now that we’ve covered the basics of what qualifies as a “sexless marriage”, let’s take a look at some of the most common causes:
Stress and Burnout
In our fast-paced, high-pressure world, it’s no surprise that stress is one of the biggest libido killers out there. When you’re constantly worrying about work, finances, kids, or a million other things, the last thing on your mind is getting intimate with your partner.
Medical Issues
Certain physical and mental health conditions can also contribute to a lack of sexual activity. Things like depression, anxiety, chronic pain, and hormonal imbalances can all make it difficult to feel in the mood.
Emotional Disconnection
If you and your partner are experiencing a breakdown in communication, trust, or emotional intimacy, that can definitely put a damper on your sex life. Resentment, anger, and a general feeling of disconnect can make it hard to feel that spark.
The Signs You Might Be in a Sexless Marriage
So, how can you tell if your marriage has reached the point of being considered “sexless”? Here are some of the telltale signs:
You Can’t Remember the Last Time You Had Sex
If you have to really rack your brain to recall the last time you and your partner got intimate, that’s a pretty clear indicator that it’s been a while.
Sex Isn’t Even on the Radar Anymore
When was the last time you or your partner initiated sexual activity? If it feels like an eternity, that’s a red flag.
You Feel Rejected or Unwanted
If you make advances and are consistently turned down, it can seriously damage your self-esteem and make you feel undesirable.
You’ve Stopped Touching Each Other
Physical touch and affection are important parts of a healthy relationship. If you find yourself avoiding even casual contact, that’s a problem.
You’re Sleeping in Separate Rooms
While this isn’t an automatic sign of a sexless marriage, it can definitely contribute to a lack of intimacy.
The Consequences of a Sexless Marriage
A “sexless marriage” can have some serious consequences, both for the individuals involved and the relationship as a whole. Here are a few of the potential drawbacks:
Feelings of Resentment and Rejection
When one partner consistently feels rejected or unwanted, it can breed resentment and damage self-esteem.
Breakdown in Communication
Without physical intimacy, it can be harder for couples to communicate openly and honestly about their needs and feelings.
Infidelity
In some cases, a sexless marriage can lead one or both partners to seek physical and emotional fulfillment outside the relationship.
Loss of Closeness and Intimacy
Sex is just one component of a healthy, intimate relationship. But a lack of it can lead to a general feeling of distance and disconnection.
What to Do If You’re in a Sexless Marriage
If you and your partner are struggling with a “sexless marriage”, the good news is that there are steps you can take to address the issue and reconnect. Here are a few suggestions:
- Communicate openly and honestly. Have a non-judgmental conversation with your partner about your concerns and needs.
- Seek professional help. A couples therapist can help you work through the underlying issues and develop a plan to reignite the spark.
- Try new things in the bedroom. Experiment with different activities, positions, or toys to keep things exciting and fresh.
- Focus on emotional intimacy. Reconnect through cuddling, massage, or other non-sexual physical touch.
- Address any medical or mental health concerns. Consult a doctor or therapist to rule out any underlying conditions.
Remember, there’s no shame in admitting that your sex life needs some work. The important thing is that you and your partner are willing to put in the effort to get your relationship back on track.
Conclusion
A “sexless marriage” can be a sensitive and complex issue, but it’s certainly not an uncommon one. By understanding the definition, causes, and consequences, you can take the first step towards addressing the problem and reclaiming the physical and emotional intimacy you and your partner deserve. So don’t be afraid to have those tough conversations, seek professional help if needed, and experiment with new ways to keep the spark alive. Your relationship (and your sex life) will thank you for it.
Frequently Asked Questions
Here are 5 FAQs related to the topic of “how is a sexless marriage defined”:
What is considered a sexless marriage?
A sexless marriage is typically defined as a marriage where sexual intimacy occurs less than 10 times per year. This can include a complete lack of sexual activity or a significant reduction in the frequency of sex compared to what is considered normal or expected in a healthy marriage. The specific definition may vary depending on the couple’s expectations and the context of their relationship.
Is a sexless marriage normal?
While a sexless marriage is not uncommon, it is generally not considered normal or healthy in the long term. Many experts believe that regular sexual intimacy is an important component of a strong, fulfilling marital relationship. However, the definition of “normal” can vary greatly between couples, and some may be content with a lower frequency of sexual activity. It’s essential to have open and honest communication with your partner to determine if the level of sexual intimacy in your marriage is acceptable for both of you.
What are the causes of a sexless marriage?
There are several potential causes of a sexless marriage, including physical factors (such as health issues, hormonal imbalances, or medication side effects), psychological factors (such as stress, depression, or low libido), and relationship issues (such as communication problems, unresolved conflicts, or a lack of emotional intimacy). In some cases, a sexless marriage may be the result of a mutual decision or agreement between the partners.
How can a sexless marriage be improved?
Improving a sexless marriage often requires a multifaceted approach. Some strategies may include seeking professional counseling or therapy, addressing any underlying physical or mental health concerns, improving communication and emotional intimacy, and making a conscious effort to prioritize sexual activity. It’s important for both partners to be willing to work on the issue and to be open to different solutions that may work for their unique situation.
What are the consequences of a long-term sexless marriage?
A long-term sexless marriage can have significant emotional and psychological consequences for the partners involved. These may include feelings of resentment, loneliness, and a lack of connection, as well as a negative impact on self-esteem and overall relationship satisfaction. In some cases, a sexless marriage may even lead to infidelity or the decision to end the relationship. It’s essential to address the issue proactively and seek support if a couple is struggling to maintain a healthy level of sexual intimacy in their marriage.


