You know the drill, ladies. Date night rolls around, and your boyfriend’s got that glimmer in his eye, thinking it’s about to be a steamy evening of passion. But what if you’re just not in the mood? Fear not, because we’ve got your back with a surefire Top 10 guide on how to trick your boyfriend into sexless datenight - all without having to sacrifice those precious couple’s bonding moments.

1. The “Headache” Hack

Who says the classic “I’ve got a headache” excuse is outdated? Embrace this tried-and-true tactic, and when your boyfriend starts getting frisky, simply hold your head and let out a convincing groan. Bonus points if you can make it look like you’re about to hurl. He’ll be so concerned for your well-being that the last thing on his mind will be getting intimate.

Variations on the Theme

• Try the “I’m on my period” move for an added layer of authenticity.
• Complain about cramps, bloating, or any other delicate female ailment to further discourage his advances.

2. The “Netflix and Chill” Switcheroo

Your boyfriend thinks he’s in for a night of cozy cuddling and maybe a little something extra. Little does he know, you’ve got a different kind of “Netflix and chill” in mind. Queue up your favorite feel-good rom-com or a mind-numbing docuseries, and make it clear that this is quality time, not quality time if you know what I mean.

Distract and Delay

• Offer to make elaborate snacks or drinks that will keep his hands (and mouth) busy with things other than you.
• Suggest a lengthy deep-dive into the film’s plot or characters, ensuring there’s no room for any hanky-panky.

3. The “Suddenly Sleepy” Sleight of Hand

As the evening progresses, start yawning and stretching, making a big show of how exhausted you are. Emphasize how much you need to get to bed early, leaving no room for bedtime activities. When he tries to initiate anything remotely sexy, simply curl up on the couch and pretend to doze off.

Commit to the Bit

• Don’t forget to maintain a convincing sleepy facade, even if he tries to wake you up.
• Offer to reschedule date night for another time when you’re “more rested.”

4. The “Chore-Filled Chaperone” Charade

Nothing kills the mood like a to-do list a mile long. Bombard your boyfriend with a never-ending stream of household tasks that need attention, from doing the laundry to cleaning the gutters. Make it clear that your evening is booked solid with chores, and any attempts at romance will only distract you from your important duties.

Guilt-Trip for Good Measure

• Remind him how much you’ve been neglecting your responsibilities lately, and how much it would mean to you if he could help out.
• Suggest that a sexless date night would allow you to get a head start on your chores for the week.

5. The “Suddenly Sick” Switcheroo

Food poisoning, a nasty cold, or a mysterious stomach bug - any of these ailments can be the perfect excuse to put the kibosh on your boyfriend’s plans. Sell the sickness with dramatic coughing, sniffling, and maybe even a trip to the bathroom every few minutes. He’ll be so focused on taking care of you that any amorous intentions will be the furthest thing from his mind.

Milk It for All It’s Worth

• Insist on staying hydrated and resting, making it clear that the only activity on the agenda is Netflix and Nyquil.
• Refuse any offers of “hands-on” nursing, lest you risk making a full recovery.

6. The “Not Tonight, Dear” Negotiation

Sometimes, the direct approach is the way to go. Sit your boyfriend down and have an honest, yet tactful, conversation about your current lack of desire. Explain that you value your relationship and still enjoy spending quality time together, but that you’re simply not feeling particularly frisky at the moment. Suggest alternative activities that will nurture your emotional connection without the expectation of physical intimacy.

Compromise, Don’t Capitulate

• Offer to reschedule date night for a time when you’re more in the mood.
• Suggest activities that are mutually enjoyable but non-sexual, like going for a walk, trying a new restaurant, or having a deep conversation.

7. The “Surprise Shopping Spree” Subterfuge

What better way to distract your boyfriend than by whisking him away on an impromptu shopping trip? Catch him off guard by suddenly declaring that you’ve got a burning desire to hit the mall or browse online stores. He’ll be so caught up in trying on clothes, comparing prices, and offering his (often unsolicited) opinions that the thought of getting frisky will be the furthest thing from his mind.

Maximize the Distraction

• Suggest trying on outfits and asking for his honest opinion, making it clear that you’re not looking for anything remotely sexy.
• Spend an exorbitant amount of time browsing and comparing items, leaving no room for anything other than serious retail therapy.

8. The “Suddenly Spiritual” Serenity

Embrace your inner yogi and declare that you’ve been called to a deeper spiritual path. Suggest a date night that involves meditation, a sound bath, or a visit to a new age crystal shop. Your boyfriend may be bewildered at first, but he’ll be so intrigued by your newfound enlightenment that he’ll be too busy trying to keep up with your spiritual journey to worry about getting physical.

Lean Into the Woo-Woo

• Insist on a tech-free, low-light environment to enhance the meditative experience.
• Encourage your boyfriend to participate in any activities that seem to require a serious level of focus and concentration.

9. The “Suddenly Studious” Scholastic Sidetrack

If your boyfriend is the academic type, try convincing him that date night should be dedicated to intellectual pursuits. Suggest a visit to a museum, a thought-provoking lecture, or even a collaborative study session. He’ll be so absorbed in expanding his mind that the last thing on his agenda will be expanding anything else.

Make It a Cerebral Affair

• Bring along scholarly books, journals, or discussion topics that will keep his brain occupied.
• Insist on frequent breaks for in-depth analysis and heated discussions, leaving no room for physical intimacy.

10. The “Suddenly Sociable” Soiree Switcheroo

Sometimes, the best way to avoid an intimate evening is to invite a crowd. Surprise your boyfriend by planning a double date or a group outing with your closest friends. He’ll be so caught up in socializing and playing the gracious host that he’ll forget all about his original plans for a romantic rendezvous. Plus, who wants to get frisky with an audience?

Maximize the Crowd

• Suggest activities that require everyone’s attention, like a trivia night or a cooking class.
• Make sure to keep the group engaged and entertained, leaving no opportunity for your boyfriend to steal you away for some one-on-one time.

Remember, the key to a successful sexless datenight is to be creative, committed, and, above all, kind. Your boyfriend’s feelings are important, so try to strike a balance between honesty and tact. With a little bit of planning and a healthy dose of imagination, you can enjoy a date night that’s truly tailored to your needs - no pressure, no expectations, just quality time together.