Sat Jul 06 - Written by: Nikki Martinez
What Of Marriages Are Sexless
Discover the surprising truths behind sexless marriages - from hidden desires to secret techniques that can reignite the spark. Prepare to be enlightened and empowered!
You’d think a marriage would be the perfect recipe for a thriving sex life - two people, madly in love, with unlimited access to each other’s bodies. But for far too many couples, the bedroom is as dry as the Sahara. If you’re one of the unlucky ones whose “what of marriages are sexless”, fear not! We’re here to uncover the shocking truth behind these dormant bedsheets.
Reason #1: The Dreaded Intimacy Aversion
It’s a cruel irony - the people we’re most intimate with can also be the ones we feel furthest from. For some married couples, the “what of marriages are sexless” can stem from a deep-seated aversion to emotional (and physical) intimacy. Past traumas, trust issues, or simply feeling “too close” can all contribute to this bedroom-killing phenomenon.
Overcoming Intimacy Aversion
The path back to intimacy often requires professional help, such as couples counseling. Learning to communicate your needs and fears in a safe, judgment-free environment can be the first step towards reigniting that spark.
Reason #2: The Dreaded Intimacy Aversion, Part 2
But it’s not just emotional intimacy that can suffer in a marriage - physical intimacy can fall by the wayside as well. Some spouses simply feel uncomfortable with their bodies or the idea of being vulnerable during sex. This can manifest in a variety of ways, from performance anxiety to outright refusal to engage.
Restoring Physical Intimacy
Tackling this issue head-on, with open and honest communication, can be crucial. Trying new activities in the bedroom, or even just relearning how to be physically affectionate, can help overcome the mental blocks.
Reason #3: The Dreaded Libido Disparity
It’s a tale as old as time - one partner wants sex constantly, while the other would be perfectly content to never do the deed again. This “what of marriages are sexless” scenario can create a rift that feels impossible to bridge, as each spouse feels frustrated and misunderstood.
Navigating the Libido Gap
Compromise is key here. Exploring ways to meet in the middle, whether through scheduled intimacy or mutual masturbation, can help ensure both partners’ needs are met. And remember - a healthy sex life isn’t just about frequency, but quality as well.
Reason #4: The Dreaded Medical Malaise
Sometimes, the “what of marriages are sexless” can have a decidedly clinical cause. Underlying health conditions, from hormonal imbalances to chronic pain, can zap the desire (and ability) to get it on. And let’s not forget the toll that certain medications can take on one’s libido.
Addressing the Medical Factors
If you suspect a medical issue is at the root of your sexless marriage, don’t hesitate to consult a professional. A doctor or sex therapist can help identify the problem and develop a plan to get your sex life back on track.
Reason #5: The Dreaded Emotional Baggage
Ah, the joys of marriage - two people, each carrying a lifetime’s worth of emotional baggage, suddenly forced to unpack it all together. It’s no wonder that “what of marriages are sexless” is a common side effect. Unresolved conflicts, resentment, and a general lack of emotional intimacy can all contribute to a bedroom blackout.
Unpacking the Emotional Baggage
Therapy, both individual and couples-based, can be incredibly helpful in addressing the underlying emotional issues that are sabotaging your sex life. Learning to communicate effectively, resolve conflicts, and rebuild trust can be transformative.
Reason #6: The Dreaded Parenthood Predicament
Having kids is a beautiful, life-changing experience. It’s also a total libido-killer. The stress, exhaustion, and general upheaval of parenthood can leave little room for the horizontal mambo. No wonder “what of marriages are sexless” is a common refrain among new moms and dads.
Reclaiming Intimacy After Kids
It’s crucial to carve out dedicated “us time” amidst the chaos of family life. Prioritizing date nights, sekrit sexcapades, and even scheduled lovemaking can help rekindle that spark. And don’t be afraid to get creative - quickies in the laundry room, anyone?
Reason #7: The Dreaded Infidelity Fallout
Nothing destroys trust (and libido) quite like infidelity. Whether it’s a one-night stand or a full-blown affair, betrayal can leave a gaping wound in a marriage that’s difficult to heal. It’s no wonder that “what of marriages are sexless” is a common outcome in the aftermath.
Rebuilding Trust After Cheating
Recovering from infidelity is a long, arduous process, but it’s not impossible. Couples counseling, open communication, and a genuine commitment to rebuilding trust can all help pave the way back to intimacy. But it takes time, patience, and a willingness to be vulnerable.
Reason #8: The Dreaded Boredom Blues
Let’s face it - even the most passionate of marriages can fall victim to the dreaded “what of marriages are sexless” if the bedroom routine becomes too predictable. When the thrill is gone and sex feels more like a chore than a pleasure, it’s no wonder couples start to lose interest.
Reigniting the Bedroom Spark
Spicing things up in the bedroom can work wonders. Trying new positions, incorporating toys, or even just switching up the location can help rekindle that sense of excitement and adventure. And don’t forget the power of spontaneity - surprise your partner with a steamy encounter in an unexpected place.
Reason #9: The Dreaded Addiction Albatross
Substance abuse, whether it’s alcohol, drugs, or even an unhealthy obsession with technology, can wreak havoc on a couple’s sex life. The “what of marriages are sexless” phenomenon is all too common when one or both partners are struggling with addiction.
Overcoming Addiction’s Toll on Intimacy
Addressing the addiction, through professional help or a support system, is the first crucial step. But it’s also important to rebuild the emotional and physical intimacy that was lost in the process. Patience, understanding, and a willingness to reconnect can all help guide the way.
Reason #10: The Dreaded Hormonal Havoc
Last but not least, the “what of marriages are sexless” can sometimes be attributed to simple biology. Hormonal changes, whether due to age, medication, or underlying conditions, can wreak havoc on a person’s libido and sexual function.
Balancing the Hormonal Scales
If you suspect hormones are to blame for your sexless marriage, don’t hesitate to seek medical advice. A doctor can help identify the root cause and develop a treatment plan to restore that elusive bedroom mojo.
Frequently Asked Questions
Here are 5 FAQs related to the topic “What are sexless marriages?”:
What is a sexless marriage?
A sexless marriage is generally defined as a relationship in which sex occurs less than 10 times per year. This can be due to a variety of factors, such as reduced libido, relationship issues, health problems, or other personal circumstances. Sexless marriages are more common than one might think, affecting an estimated 15-20% of couples.
What are the causes of sexless marriages?
There are many potential causes of sexless marriages, including:
- Decreased sexual desire or libido in one or both partners
- Relationship problems, such as poor communication, resentment, or lack of intimacy
- Health issues, such as hormonal imbalances, chronic pain, or mental health conditions
- Stress, fatigue, or other life pressures that reduce the desire for physical intimacy
- Differences in sexual needs or preferences between partners
- The natural ebbs and flows of sexual activity in long-term relationships
How can a sexless marriage be addressed?
Addressing a sexless marriage often requires open and honest communication between partners, as well as a willingness to work on the underlying issues. Strategies may include:
- Seeking couples counseling or sex therapy to improve communication and address relationship problems
- Discussing and addressing any physical or mental health factors that may be contributing to the lack of intimacy
- Experimenting with new ways of being intimate, such as cuddling, massage, or sensual activities without intercourse
- Scheduling regular “date nights” or intimacy-focused time together
- Seeking individual therapy or support for any personal issues that may be affecting the relationship
Is a sexless marriage doomed to fail?
Not necessarily. While a lack of physical intimacy can certainly put strain on a marriage, a sexless marriage is not necessarily destined to end in divorce. Many couples are able to maintain fulfilling relationships despite low sexual activity, as long as they are able to communicate openly, meet each other’s emotional needs, and find other ways to feel connected. However, if the lack of sex is a symptom of deeper relationship problems that cannot be resolved, it may ultimately lead to the end of the marriage.
How common are sexless marriages?
Sexless marriages are more common than some may realize. Studies suggest that around 15-20% of married couples have not had sex with their partner in the last six months to a year. The prevalence tends to increase with the length of the marriage, with around 4% of married couples reportedly having sex less than once a year. While uncommon, sexless marriages are not exceptionally rare, and it’s important for couples to address the issue openly and seek help if needed.


