Buckle up, folks, because we’re about to dive deep into the scandalous world of sexless marriages. Now, I know what you’re thinking - “A sexless marriage? That’s like a unicorn, right?” Wrong-o, my friends. Sexless marriages are more common than you might think, and trust me, they’re not exactly a barrel of laughs.

Is Your Marriage Sexless? 10 Signs to Look Out For

1. You Can’t Remember the Last Time You Got Jiggy With It

If you’re racking your brain, struggling to remember the last time you and your partner, you know, “did the deed,” then chances are, you might be in a sexless marriage. It’s like trying to recall the last time you won the lottery - it just doesn’t happen often enough to keep track.

2. Netflix and Chill… Alone

You know that old saying, “Netflix and chill?” Well, in a sexless marriage, it’s more like Netflix and “I’d rather just chill, thanks.” When you’d rather binge-watch the entire Marvel Cinematic Universe than get intimate with your spouse, it’s a telltale sign that something’s amiss in the bedroom.

3. Your Mattress is Gathering Dust

Remember that time you and your partner couldn’t keep your hands off each other? Yeah, me neither. In a sexless marriage, your mattress is more of a storage unit than a place for romance. It’s where you keep your collection of used socks and that sweater you’ve been meaning to donate for the past three years.

Reasons for a Sexless Marriage

4. Stress: The Marriage Killer

Let’s face it, life can be a real buzzkill sometimes. When the pressures of work, finances, and that pesky thing called “adulting” start to weigh you down, the last thing on your mind is getting busy between the sheets. Stress can be the silent killer of a sexless marriage.

5. The Dreaded “Headache”

We’ve all heard the age-old excuse, “Not tonight, dear, I have a headache.” In a sexless marriage, that line might as well be the official state motto. Turns out, headaches, illness, and even plain old fatigue can put a major damper on your sex life.

6. The Elephant in the Bedroom

Sometimes, the reason for a sexless marriage is as plain as the nose on your face, but you’re just too afraid to address it. Whether it’s an issue with intimacy, a lack of attraction, or even an unresolved conflict, ignoring the elephant in the bedroom is a surefire way to keep the passion on lockdown.

Dealing with a Sexless Marriage

7. Communication is Key (and Sexy)

When it comes to a sexless marriage, communication is the holy grail. It’s time to put on your best “sexy therapist” hat and have an open, honest conversation with your partner about what’s going on. Don’t be afraid to get vulnerable, because vulnerability is the new black, baby.

8. Spice Things Up

If the thought of another Netflix and “chill” night makes you want to curl up and die, it’s time to get creative. Shake things up in the bedroom (or the kitchen, or the backseat - no judgment here) by trying new things, exploring fantasies, or simply making more time for intimacy. Sexless marriages thrive on spontaneity.

9. Seek Professional Help

Sometimes, a sexless marriage is the result of deeper issues that require the expertise of a professional. Don’t be afraid to reach out to a sex therapist or marriage counselor who can help you and your partner work through the underlying problems and reignite the spark.

The Consequences of a Sexless Marriage

10. The Emotional Toll

Let’s be real, a sexless marriage can take a serious toll on your emotional well-being. Feelings of rejection, resentment, and even depression can start to creep in, making it even harder to reconnect with your partner. It’s a vicious cycle, but with the right mindset and tools, you can break free.

So, there you have it, folks - a comprehensive guide to navigating the treacherous waters of a sexless marriage. Remember, you’re not alone, and with a little bit of effort, communication, and maybe even a few tricks up your sleeve, you can reclaim the intimacy you once shared. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some “Netflix and chill” plans to make.

Frequently Asked Questions

Here are 5 FAQs related to the topic of “when are you in a sexless marriage”:

What is considered a sexless marriage?

A sexless marriage is generally defined as a marriage where there is little to no sexual activity between the partners. While there is no official definition, most experts agree that a sexless marriage is one where the couple has sex less than 10 times per year. However, the exact number can vary depending on the individuals involved and their expectations for a healthy sex life.

What are the common causes of a sexless marriage?

There are several potential causes for a sexless marriage, including:

• Lack of intimacy and connection between partners
• Unresolved conflicts or resentment in the relationship
• Stress, fatigue, or other life circumstances that diminish desire
• Underlying medical or mental health issues, such as low libido, erectile dysfunction, or depression
• Differing sexual needs or preferences between partners
• Infidelity or breach of trust
• Hormonal changes, such as those that occur during pregnancy or menopause

How does a sexless marriage impact the relationship?

A sexless marriage can have a significant impact on the relationship, including:

• Feelings of loneliness, rejection, and disconnection between partners
• Decreased emotional and physical intimacy
• Increased likelihood of infidelity or seeking sexual fulfillment outside the marriage
• Resentment, frustration, and overall relationship dissatisfaction
• Impact on self-esteem and feelings of desirability
• Difficulty conceiving children, if that is a goal for the couple

Can a sexless marriage be saved?

Yes, a sexless marriage can be saved, but it requires a willingness from both partners to address the issue and work on improving the sexual and emotional intimacy in the relationship. This may involve seeking counseling, exploring new ways to connect and be intimate, addressing underlying issues, or making changes to lifestyle and stress levels. With commitment and effort, it is possible to reignite the sexual spark in a sexless marriage.

When is it time to consider ending a sexless marriage?

If attempts to address the lack of sexual intimacy in the marriage have been unsuccessful, and the partners are unable to come to a mutually satisfactory solution, it may be time to consider ending the marriage. This is a deeply personal decision that should not be made lightly, as it involves considering the overall health and fulfillment of the relationship, the impact on any children involved, and the ability of both partners to move forward in a productive way. Seeking the guidance of a counselor or therapist can be helpful in navigating this complex decision.